First Kill
by Xanderlike
Summary: "It's three months before Erik asks her to kill for him." Mystique goes on her first mission for the Brotherhood.


She's with Erik three months before he asks her to kill for him.

Its three months of relentless training nearly every day. He teaches her how to fight. (She does surprisingly well at it—an inhuman flexibility and strength coupled with a rage that seems to grow every passing day soon allows her to eclipse her teacher.) He teaches her how to pick locks and begins tutoring her in languages.

He has Frost teach her other things … how to lie to a man with just a look. How to smile at someone who disgusts her. How to make promises with her eyes that she has no intention of keeping. How to make someone think she wants them.

And when Frost says that she's ready, Erik tells her what he wants her to do.

She doesn't want to do it. She knows that Charles will never forgive her. She knows that if she does this thing that she will never be able to go back home—go back to _him_—again.

And she realizes that's exactly what Erik is counting on.

It's a test.

The man she is to kill is Professor K. Spensser. He's working for the US Government on something called Project Sentinel. Erik tells her that it's vital for their cause that Spensser not be allowed to complete his work.

But Erik _needs_ to see Spensser's work. He needs to see how much progress the government has made since the Cuban Missile Crisis. So she isn't just supposed to kill him—she has to get access to his work, first.

It's not easy.

Spensser reminds her of Hank McCoy. He's a big, heavyset young man—brilliant, but painfully shy. He has no friends, no family. He goes to work every day and returns home. He doesn't drink. He doesn't socialize.

Beautiful women make him nervous. Every form she tries—every time she tries to use what Frost has taught him—he retreats in confusion and anxiety.

In his way, he's as much an outcast as any mutant.

It takes two weeks and four forms before she comes up with a way to connect with him. She's not able to do it alone—she involves Riptide and a heavily disguised Azazel as "muggers" to accost her on a dark street where only Spensser is available to "save" her.

It's easy to pretend to play the part of the grateful damsel in distress, and the form she takes—chubby, short, freckled, with horn rimmed glasses—is harmless enough that Spensser doesn't bolt in fear.

He takes her to a diner to recover from her shock. He's kind, and considerate, and doesn't dream of taking advantage of her like she had expected. She almost calls him "Hank" twice in their conversation because the similarity is so strong.

He asks her to go with him to a movie the next night, and she says yes because she can't think of a way to get him to take her home that night.

The movie is some forgettable comedy, and even if she weren't preoccupied with what she was supposed to do she would not have enjoyed it. She's been on dates before, but never with someone like Spensser. He's not doing the things that Frost taught her to expect—he's not doing the things she's had other boys try with her when she would—at Charles' insistence—go out with his friends.

She kisses him good night, and from his reaction she's positive it's the first kiss that he's ever known.

The next night they go out to dinner, and he tells her that he's been working on developing an exoskeleton that would allow the paralyzed to walk, to allow men to live on alien worlds and deep beneath the ocean.

She's positive he's not lying. His enthusiasm is impossible to fake. He's speaking with too much passion, about too strong a dream …an impossible, mad dream that reminds her of Charles.

She tells him to take her home. _His _home.

Once there, all she has to do is kill him, find the pass that allow her access to his laboratory, and take his place.

Instead, she takes his hand and leads him into the bedroom.

When it's over, he takes her in his arms and asks her to marry him.

She's tempted.

She's tempted by this portly man with the kind eyes and voice that holds her in his arms like Erik never does, like Charles never will. She's tempted to run away with him and lead a normal life where she does not have to choose between two worlds, two dreams … between hope and fear, hate and love.

She's tempted to stay with him and take his love, have his children …

And the thought of what sort of children she would have, and the world they would live in, makes her get out of his bed and resume her true form.

She expects fear. She expects disgust. She expects him to hate her.

He doesn't.

She tells him what the government is doing with his work.

He insists that he did not know, that he would never allow his work to be used for war. He tells that he'll help her stop this. He tells her that he still loves her and still wants her. He tells her that none of this has to matter between them.

So hopeful, so naïve. So much like Charles.

She smiles at him and slips back into his arms.

He doesn't flinch. He smiles back at her, and his eyes are so filled with love and trust that her heart feels like it's going to burst.

She kisses him as she snaps his neck.

"I'm sorry, Kurt. It's too late for that. I already made my choice."

Later she'll cry. She'll shower and try to wash the memory of his touch away. She'll weep for him and all the other people she's going to have to kill to make the world safe for her kind. She'll cry for them now because she knows she won't be able to do so in the future.

Now she has a mission to complete.

Raven could be tempted by a human's love. Raven could turn her back on Erik and the cause. Raven could love.

Mystique doesn't have that option.


End file.
